There's Always Something

Today was one of the most glorious days ever conceived of in the brain of humans- a teacher workday.  There's a different vibe in the school on those days, mainly due to the fact that there are no kiddies in there and that the teachers are noticeably happier.  Something about being able to laminate and staple things all day really puts us in the mood to work.  Anyway, we all waltz in with our jeans and crew neck sweatshirts (or maybe that's just me) and get to work on the to-do list we've created for the day.  Usually, this to-do list begins with something like "Finish math plans for the week" and ends with something like "Rebuild the Presidential Palace in Haiti."  So, inevitably, by the end of your day, no matter how much you have done (I mean you could have graded a five foot stack of papers, reorganized your classroom library, and laminated every piece of paper in your room), you STILL would not have finished all the tasks you set out to do.

If teaching (and life) has taught me anything, it's that there's always something.  There's always something you didn't do that you could have done, always something you did that you shouldn't have done.  There are mistakes.  There are character flaws.  There are things you want to change but don't have the time to.  Don't have the energy to.  There are days when you want to do more- when you should do more- but you can't.  And just as often, there are days when we finally feel happy for what we've accomplished, only to wish that it had been just a little more.  Just that little extra inch.  We're left thinking, "If only...", dreaming about how it could be better, forgetting that it already is pretty good.

It can be really tempting to fall into that trap of forgetting to be grateful for the things you have right in front of you, the blessings you hold in your hands.  It's easy to look ahead to tomorrow and want something different than what you already have.  I'm not really one to tell people, "Just be happy with what you've got!" because I think ambition and drive are things that are really important.  Not only are they important, but they're natural.  It's natural to evolve, to improve, to step forward.  But at the same time, I think no matter what- no matter how much we believe that that ONE thing is the only thing between us and contentment- there will always be something.  And once that something is gone, it will be something else.  It's that elusive "something" that keeps us from being thankful or happy or just done.  And that's the same whether you're a teacher, a lover, a friend, or a person (or all of the above).

For tonight, I'm throwing out all those "somethings" and trying to be happy with the surprisingly productive day that I had.  I mean, come on- I even managed to get in a blog post.